Gigli. I thought it might be comically bad, but no, it’s just the moldy cardboard of Awesome Skull The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Fuck Coronavirus Shirt movies. So I turned it off. When that movie came out I remember there was a big billboard for Roger Ebert where he was slumped over his desk with his head in his hands looking near death. The caption was, “I saw Gigli so you don’t have to”. I went to a mean girls bar trivia night once. At one point the host asked a question and everyone in the crowd stared at each other, confused that the question referenced characters we didn’t even know. The host clarified “this question comes from mean girls 2” The entire bar booed incredibly loudly. None of them looked or acted old enough to know about sex.
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For this one, the absence of Awesome Skull The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Fuck Coronavirus Shirt writer Tina Fey should have told you everything you needed to know. I lasted 30 minutes and then I immediately left the theater. Human faces on roaches creeped me the hell out, as did whatever else I saw in that time frame. I saw Cats in a packed theater and we all were laughing and making fun of the film. It was one of the best movie-going experiences I’ve had. I had that experience years ago with Scream 3. Absolutely amazing. Every time a character walked into a telegraphed deathtrap, there’s near-silence punctuated by the occasional snickering, then they die and the whole cinema exploded with peals of laughter. I went with a group of friends and we each brought a flask of tequila with us. We were the only people in the theater. It was amazing to trash talk the whole time and get progressively drunker. Every time Idris Elba would shout MAGIC and disappear we would lose our shit.
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She doesn’t even like Madea. I sat through the first five minutes before I couldn’t take any more. An Awesome Skull The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Fuck Coronavirus Shirt while later she finished it and told me “…yep. Madea still sucks.” I have absolutely no excuse other than I paid $1 in the Blockbuster bin for it and needed to win the “Worst movie” contest with a bunch of friends on Fantasy Movie Friday. FYI: You don’t know bad cinema until the bad guys have the evil henchmen in a sword and sorcery flick is wear a spangly rooster costume fight chicken-style alongside the guy in a sequined top hat surrounded by knives and bowtie on top of an ape suit.
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